Thursday, January 22, 2009

Two People, One Office: A Psychological Assessment

The setting: Two adults -- one male, one female, each working from home -- share a small office for ten hours a day. The male, hunched over four loud, heat-generating computers, only stirs once every few hours to stretch his dodgy knee. The female, distracted by the noise of the street and the Internet, ventures periodically into the kitchen for sustenance -- most often of the chocolate variety.

The conflict: Several factors appear to cause strife between the two. One such factor appears to be when the female collects more than five mugs on her desk, leading the male to abandon his work to fulfil his compulsion to wash said mugs. Another factor is observable when the female leaves her desk, returns with food and proceeds to eat without providing for the male. It cannot be said, however, that the male is without blame. He frequently interrupts the female's work with exclamations and interjections, and often takes long conference calls within the female's vicinity.

The resolution: As the couple reside in Central London, moving to a larger flat is not an option. It is predicted that after a period of initial irritation, both will become immune to the minor conflicts and a lengthy period of calm will descend. Alternatively, the female will crush the male's computers with force, banishing him elsewhere.

It cannot be foretold which outcome is more likely to occur.

6 comments:

Elia said...

This commenter thinks the above post is hilarious. She sends her moral support and a virtual sledgehammer.

AC said...

That is SO funny. It's exactly what would happen if my husband and I shared an office, right down to the multiple mugs on my desk at one time and the multiple computers for him. Good luck!

Criss said...

BWAHAHAA!!!

This is one of the reasons I convinced my husband the extra desk had to go in the living room... one of us can be in the office, the other OUT of the office.

KimB said...

I thought the male worked elsewhere during the hours of said female's work, thereby sharing the office in a mutually satisfying manner?

Marsha said...

Thanks for the moral support! A desk in the living room - or a sledgehammer - might be options! I'm starting to pull out my hair...

Kim - the male did work elsewhere until Nov when said male then started to work from home. Ergh!

MikeH said...

One room. Two dedicated people with different working styles. Bad combination.

Five mugs!!!! I'd be taking them off your desk after the third one. not that I'm compulsive, or anything