Tuesday, June 23, 2009

WAG: What Lies Beneath

I've been bad, bad, bad at doing the writing adventure group's exercises lately. But hopefully, I shall redeem myself with this attempt. This week the assigment is to select a couple. Write about the “secret” part of their relationship… the things about this couple that they don’t show to the world.

This week, I was inspired by this article in the oh-so-reputable Sun newspaper. Honestly, I don't know if they try to be entertaining, but they certainly succeed.

So here goes.

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'Honey, did you get it?' He lowers his voice and leans towards her.

Her eyes dart around the room. She nods. 'It's in the back garden. I gave it some lettuce. Isn't that what they eat?'

Her husband shrugs. 'I dunno. It won't be around be around for long, anyway. I've got the BBQ fired up. Jim and the boys are coming round at nine. It's gonna be one hell of a feast!'

She digs in her purse and holds out a paper. 'Here's the receipt. We can return it in fourteen days if we're not happy.'

'Honey, it ain't gonna be around for fourteen days, innit? We're 'aving it tonight!' He scans the paper. 'Hang on a second. Hang on! What the hell is this?' His finger stabs the paper.

She leans over. 'What? Yeah, I dunno, I just signed where I needed to. I didn't actually read it.'

His face is red. 'WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WE CAN'T EAT THE HORSE?'

Silence.

Finally, he says: 'We'll do it in secret. We'll roast it in the oven. I don't care how we do it, we're eating that horse.'

4 comments:

Jessica said...

LOL! A horse, yuck.
I popped by because I saw on Gardner's blog party that you liked cinnamon rolls, which I happened to eat for breakfast today. :-)

Nixy Valentine said...

Oh dear... makes me wonder if I should start reading the Sun, just for the everyday oddity!

dan powell said...

They Eat Horses, Don't They? Great source material. Love his insistence that they will eat the beast, come what may.

Mickey said...

I was thinking rabbit... The return policy thing just made it for me! Funny!